It seems these days that everyone is seeking perfection. A perfect job, perfect dating sites, perfect wife/husband, perfect children which they feel will add up to a perfect life. WRONG! The only person you can “perfect” is YOU! So why are you demanding this perfection from another?
What is perfection anyway? Whose standards are YOU using to define perfection? Why would you WANT perfection? I will take these one at a time.
Perfection is the absence of flaws or “defects”. So, a perfect rose would be exquisite but really, are there any perfect humans? Real perfection, the absence of flaws, is in the eye of the beholder. Looking for physical perfection? Why? How does this validate you? What part of YOUR ego is involved in refusing to deal with someone you deem “imperfect”? How does physical perfection make you feel? While some people (mostly men but some women) feel a “perfectly attractive” mate makes them look better, how does this person make you FEEL? If you, yourself have seen past the “perfection” to the person inside, maybe this person really is a perfect fit for you. However, there are some “perfectly” beautiful men AND women who have never had the opportunity to grow and be the people they COULD be had they not been so beautiful. My husband was a case in point.
He was beautiful to look at, but he never had anyone, NOT ONE PERSON that he felt accountable to. Can you imagine what a sense of entitlement this breeds? He was in his late 40’s and had the nerve to tell me only ONE other woman had ever told him NO, in his entire LIFE. WHAT? That was before we married. In bringing him up to speed, I did share with him that I was not a “yes” person. I was not so afraid of losing him that I would not speak my mind with clarity, conviction, love and honesty.
These are the foundations of a perfect relationship. You want (and I mean really want) a person who is honest, ethical, generous in spirit (because that kind of generosity spills over into every aspect of their being), kind and loving. Refreshingly different from anyone you have ever known. Should someone be in your life right now with these qualities, you owe it to yourself to take another look at that relationship. Maybe they don’t look perfect, but getting to know someone who does not meet your impossibly high standards is a testimony to your inner strength and courage in seeking and finding that “perfect” relationship.
Finding and building a perfect relationship requires the ability to be critical of you. I don’t mean that self pity type of critical; I am referring to critical THINKING regard yourself, where you are emotionally and spiritually. Are you ready for a relationship? Have you worked through the issues in that could have contributed to relationships that “failed” in the past? In reality, you can learn a lot about yourself and what you need by the failures in your life. So, have you learned your lessons? Be ready when that opportunity for a new, exciting relationship presents itself. Be grateful for the opportunity and then proceed with integrity, generosity, kindness and LOVE!